Introduction

Hi everyone!

I never thought I would be writing a blog. Over the last few weeks some dramatic changes have take place in my life and I have come to the conclusion that for me a blog may be a good way for me to explore what I am going through. Available for sharing but not presented for sharing.

I want to explore what I am going through, I want to watch it evolve into whatever it becomes. The process is complicated by medications so some manic mood changes are present, but that is part of the process also. The exploration has to include what i feel as well as the facts (which are usually separated by a degree or two anyway).

BACKGROUND:
My name is Jeff and I am a 48 year old systems analyst for a large health care organization. I have four kids, Anthony (26), Erin (25), Mitchell (12) and Reese (he will be 7 this Saturday). My wife Rebecca and I have been together 9 years. She is the BEST thing to ever happen to me. When we first met I was aimless, there was no measure or motive to my life, I was divorced with an amazing amount of back child support. Making little money, I took pride in my self-imposed martyr status ( ha, being a martyr is EASY, you don't have to DO anything). She saw through it, not sure how, but she did. She took my hand and and we made something together. She showed me (indirectly) how it was possible to create a real life, to choose what you wanted and head in that direction. I don't know how this was unknown to me, was it a lack of example, laziness, ignorance or apathy? Not sure,, she made it seem like magic though.

So here we are much later..she has her BS and JD, I am just about to get my BS and nd have begun the admission process for my masters. Thanks to B. we are on track to a normal life!